To The One My Children Will Never Meet

To the one who my children will never meet, 

Losing you was hard, I could write countless letters with all the emotions: sadness, anger, happiness, frustration, the list is endless. But this letter is a letter of both sadness and admiration. 

 It saddens me you'll never meet my children (not that I've had them yet) but when I think of my future and you not being there to hold my hand, guide me and answer all my worries it creates a deep void within me that I'm not quite sure will ever fade. 

As well as my own loss, I feel a deep loss for you. You'll never get to meet my mini me, you won't get to play your little role plays that you so often played with me or let them fill your living room with Sylvaian families without tripping or stepping or some sort of little pieces of plastic. I know that you would have been an absolute amazing nanny, just as you were my mother. 

It's also a loss for my future children. They won't get to experience what a beautiful soul you were, they will have to listen to their mums words. Which simply are that - just words. Words that you know children don't comprehend. 

Although I'll tell them the countless adventurers we had, show them all the pictures of their beautiful nanny and tell them what a remarkable lady you are, it still breaks my heart a little bit more every time knowing they'll never get to meet the woman who is my admiration and my hero. 

All my love, 

Meg