Happy Birthday Mum

The time of year is coming up when all my emotions start to show through. March is always a really hard time of year for me, as well as May and Christmas (basically half the year). 

March consists of two big celebrations: my Mum's birthday and Mothers Day. When you've lost someone, celebrations like this are always really hard to go through, no matter how long ago it was. When she left, it wasn't expected, she wasn't terminally ill, she died so quickly and sudden. 

This will be the third time I have to go through this, and it's not got much easier. Birthday's were always such a big occasion in my house, we'd make a massive day of it and it was just very special. I always see things and think "oh, she would love that" and it makes me sad that there is no time I'm able to give it to her. The only present I am able to give her is flowers. Something she wasn't particularly fond of anyways (typical hayfever)

Me and my step mum always do something to celebrate her birthday, as although it is a sad time of year, it shouldn't be a day of sadness, it should be a day of celebration. My mum wouldn't want us crying until its hard to tell whether our bodies are made up of 50% tears and 50% skin. She would want us to remember all the good times, the happy times. 

I know that I can no longer give her a physical gift, but I know the best gift I can give her now is my happiness and enjoyment of life. No matter how tough life gets, I always remind myself "things always get better" and they do. I live my life with a smile on my face, not wasting the life she gave me and living as if each day is my last. 

So, Happy Birthday Mum, my angel. 

- Meg